You know what I don't get to see enough of these days? Your balls.
Thanks so much for remedying that today you disgusting, hairy, Sasquatch of a man. For future reference, the public bathroom isn't the best place to scope out "your situation." Maybe venture into a stall next time.
I truly hope your balls get violently ill from heat exhaustion. When's the last time a razor visited that general area, anyway? Did the Bulls still have Scotty Pippen? That shit's not a cloak of invisibility, either, if that's what you were hoping for.
Do me two favors: 1) downgrade those fellas from a fleece sweater to a light t-shirt and 2) start applying for as many other jobs as possible. Maybe something in 70's-themed porn.